The Hobbler

13.1 miles. Its a lot. I want to say I ran the whole thing, but that'd be a lie. Its hard, man. I give props to anyone who runs a half marathon and I'll bow down to anyone who does a full marathon. That's determinations.

I wasn't necessarily nervous, more anxious. I just wanted to start and finish the race. As the time approached to begin, I lined up in the middle of the group. I'm not the fastest and I don't want to be last. The middle is a good place for me. The announcer blew the whistle and I ran.

I started off with the 1:45 pacer. Which is much faster than I normally run and better than I was aiming for. My goal was 2 hours, but I wouldn't have been upsest if it took 2:30. I just wanted to finish. I stayed with the 1:45 pacer for about the first 4 miles, which I was really proud of.
I kept my eyes open for the 1:50 pacer who didn't catch up with me til mile 6. We chatted for a minute and then he passed me quickly after that.

I never read any etiquette for running but I assume that others runners don't want to hear your music when you run beside them. Well I don't like running with head phones so I just put my iPhone on speaker so I could still l isten to music. That also meant everyone around me could hear it. I like to think that it made their run more enjoyable, but more likely it just pissed people off. Sorry. I do know that it made me stand out; one guy referred to me as the girl with loud music.

The interactions with other runners is one of the best things about running. I'm a down hill runner, I die when I run up hill. As I was walking up a hill a guy passed and with a thumb's up he said, "You can do it." I ran up every hill after that. I caught up to him in the last mile and I thanked him. Around mile 11 I stopped to walk and a man that passed me said, "me too." We're all in it together and it seems like everyone wants the other runners to succeed. The only exception is the first 5 to 10 runners who are focused on winning and don't care about anyone behind them. That will never be me.

My favorite part was running through the canyon, slight breeze, sun shining on the hills and one of my favorite songs came on: Mayberry by Rascal flatts. I was in heaven. It was so peaceful. I could've ran forever like that...figuratively.

The last mile was killer. I walked at least half of it. I was ready to be done at that point. My feet and legs were aching. However, it was great knowing that I was so close to being done. If I pushed myself harder I could've ran more at the end, but I wanted to save some of my energy to sprint through the finish line. You gotta show off at the end, right? I happy to get to groups of people standing on the side of the road, and little girls with pom poms, yelling "one more turn!" There were about 3 more turns, but the end was close; that was the point.

The last 50 yards was grass, which was great to run on. And the sidelines were packed with people: runners who had finished, family, friends, supporters, and Brandon, the love of my life. As I made that last turn I saw the clock 1:59:20. I could make 2 hours. I sprinted to the end. I finished in 1 hour 59 minutes and 47 seconds. I made it! I made my goal!

Brandon met me on the other side, and I gave him a big sweaty hug. He is such a great support to me. What an incredible feeling to have finished running 13 miles!

I don't know if I'll ever do a full marathon. I want to say that I will. If I do, it would only ever be one, I'm sure of that. But I can definitely see myself running more half marathons.

Live in the Moment

First off, I have missed blogging. I've become too busy for it. I've recently been reading others blogs and I've realized that I can always have time to blog, even the most simple thought can be turned into a post and that would be fulfilling to me. So I am determined to blog much more often.

Live in the moment. That's some of the best advice I could give. Its hard, and I'm definitely a hypocrite. I wold love to say that I always thoroughly enjoy the moment I'm in, but its so easy to start thinking about the next thing I have to do. I have most recently been studying for finals, which are next week. I am also planning my wedding which is in six weeks. If you don't look forward then you fail at life. That's not the point. The trick to living in the moment is enjoying whatever you are doing right then. Take it in, get the most out of it. Stop wishing to move onto the next step.

Now for instance, I'm writing this blog and I'm loving just letting my thoughts flow and not worrying about the next thing I have to do. I'm not dreading studying. And hopefully when I start studying again I can get the most out that. I can put all my energy into it so I can retain the most information I can (which would be very beneficial).

One of the problems that I have is if I get upset about something, I hold it in and take that anger with me everywhere I go. I don't always show it, (well I try not to show it but I probably do) but I can't enjoy what I've doing until I let go of my frustration. I'll be mad and not have a good attitude even if I'm doing something I normally really enjoy. I need to either deal my problem right then or set it to the side until I can deal with it so I can enjoy what I'm doing. The latter normally doesn't work so I should just deal with it in the moment. Eh, what can I do?

I've seen too many times when people get caught up in the next thing they have to do to or look forward to something so far away that they aren't enjoying what they are doing right then. I could continually stress about finals, or planning my wedding or get excited about living with best friend or moving out of state or having babies. The anticipation for those things is very important but I can't forget about what I'm doing now. And right now I'm enjoying giving my mind a break and relaxing.

And I'm loving it!

"Live in the moment and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering."

-Fanny Crosby

Valentines day

I am in love.

I've never had anyone on Valentine's Day. But I'm so happy to say that the one I'm with now will be my Valentine for the rest of eternity. I dedicate this post to him.

I feel that one of the best ways to express my feelings is through music. Songs are so powerful and can say so much. I have found some of my favorite songs that express the way I feel about my lover.

You Got Me by Colbie Calliat

This describes how I felt at the beginning of our relationship and its still true today. We fell for each other fast, and everything felt so right. Our initial attraction turned into an incredible love. But I also like you so much; I enjoy you. You make me so happy.

Lost In The Moment By Big & Rich

When we're together its like the whole world disappears. All I need is you. When I'm with you all my worries go away and I feel like I can accomplish anything. I love when we're slow dancing and we become the only ones in the room. I can't wait to marry you. I feel complete when I'm with you.

You're My Best Friend By Queen

I've always said that I want to marry my best friend. I think thats key to make a relationship work. You truly are my best friend. We can resolve anything because I want you to be happy. I feel completely comfortable with you and I know I can always confide in you. Having you as my friend is one of the best parts of our relationship.

I Melt by Rascal Flats

You are my lover and I'm so grateful for your love. Its crazy that I still get butterflies when we kiss. Every minute with you is magical. You make me feel so safe. My love for you is unconditional and eternal.

Amazed by Lonestar

I love how close we've become and how well we understand each other. Everything you do to show me your love for me blows me away. You're an amazing person. We connect so well. I'm grateful for all the love you give to me.

Love You Out Loud by Rascal Flats

I love this song and I do want to scream and shout my love to the world. You are an incredible person and you make me so happy. I wish everyone could be as happy as we are.

Brandon you are my everything; my world. I couldn't live without you now. Everything about you makes me happy. I want to spend the rest of eternity looking into each other eyes. Getting married to you is the best decision I've ever made. Everything has worked out so well for us and I'm so grateful for that. You are the best person I know. I would do anything to make you happy. You are my one and my only. Being loved by you is the greatest thing in the world. I hope you always know how much I love and care about you. The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.

First Semester of College Complete!

The first semester at BYU was great and it is done! It's amazing how fast it goes by. It seems like I just barely moved into my apartment. I had taken college classes before, about 70 credits worth. But the classes I took in high school and even the 3 I took on the SLCC campus didn't quite prepare me for my experience at BYU.

Its not to say the BYU classes were extremely difficult, or the SLCC ones were a cake walk, but these were harder than what I'd taken before. And my problem was I didn't work much harder. It's said that for every hour of class you spend in class you're supposed to spend two or three hours outside of class doing homework and studying for it. With 15 credit hours, that's about 45 hours a week studying, not to mention the time your in class, work, church callings, FHE and just hanging out. That's a lot to cram in, and I'm not the best at it. Even after all the classes I've taken I still didn't handle it very well. I also don't really know how to study, and that has caused me some problems. For every test I had, I went to test reviews which accounted for at least half of the studying I did. I relied on those. Without disclosing my grades, I could've done better on a lot of those tests.

I definitely wasn't ready for the financial burden. I did get a partial scholarship for tuition, but I still had a bout $700 to pay. I had rent each month that was just under $300, and I didn't get a job until November. The first couple months I was living off what I had saved, and a credit card I got in the summer. It came down to the wire, so I started selling my plasma. My parents bailed me out, but I'm hoping I can do it on my own in the future. I eventually was able to get a job at Zupas where my roommate works. Making sandwich's and salad's was different than jobs I've had in the past, but its a great job and fun environment. Even though I'm making some money now, it still gets tight and I'm hoping to get a grant for this next semester.


I'm not saying this semester was just hard work; I definitely had some fun. The new environment is also something I wasn't prepared for. Such as living with 5 other girls, having church in the Tanner building, being on the enrichment committee, seeing one of my roommates makeout with her boyfriend on our couch (not BYU approved), having marriage brought up in most conversations and talks, paying for rent, buying my own food, living down the hall from a ton of college guys, and not having to check in with anyone if I'm out past curfew (the last two are not necessarily correlated). The freedom I have is something I definitely love, however I miss my family on occasion and still like to go home and spend time with them. This semester was a great experience and I can't wait to see what happens next.

Good old PoS

Green '94 Ford Explorer. That's my car. My sister, Michal, so graciously let me take over payments until it was paid off and now its mine. (Technically its still in her husband's name, but I have responsibility for it.) It's been a pretty good car, got me to where I needed to go: work, school, between houses; acted as transportation for a majority of the neighborhood.

But I've had quite a few problems with it...

It started last May (about a month after I got the car) when I had to get the brakes fixed. One day all of the sudden my brakes went out, I couldn't stop. I had to swerve to the side of the road to avoid hitting the car in front of me. Scared me half to death. They seemed to be working fine after that, so I kept driving on those brakes for a few days. Not a good idea, I assume it only made the brakes worse. I ended up taking it in to Big O' Tires to have it looked at and fixed. They told me I could've been in an accident at any time and shouldn't've been driving it at all. It's amazing I'm still alive. They fixed my brakes. Don't ask me what they did, I know nothing about cars. All I know is my car stopped when I pushed the left pedal and for that convenience it cost me $593.83. More than what I had. Luckily I have great parents that help out in tough times.

Less than a month later, my car is used to jump start another. I don't know what that did, put it had problems after that. My steering wheel sucked, making a U-ey was more like a 10 point turn. Took it back in to Big O', gave them $87.33 for them to replace my tensioner pulley. I don't know what exactly happened, but my air conditioner stopped working at the same time, and to fix that it would've cost me another couple hundred bucks, which I just didn't have. And now I've learned how to do my hair, so it looks intentionally messed up after driving on the freeway with the windows rolled down.

A couple months later, after coming home from a vacation, much to my surprise, the back driver side window was shattered. I attempted to get a used window at a junk yard with the help of my brother in law, Mike. But that didn't work out so well, so I went to Low Price Auto Glass where they put in a new window for $42.12. They also, so kindly, replaced, for free, my rear-view mirror, which I had broken off about a week before. It was difficult having no mirror, but I could drive just as well as before, except now I couldn't do my make-up in the car. I was glad to have that back. After fixing the window, they didn't put the inside of the door back on correctly; so I ask passengers not to use that one, otherwise they may not be able to close it. Guess that's what you get for getting your window fixed at a cheap place in West Valley.

That was the end of my troubles for awhile. Besides the occasional oil change and fillin' up on gas twice a month, everything was going smooth. But in the last few weeks I had more problems than I was ready for.

I took my car to get it checked to renew my registration at Just Inspection and Emissions. They looked at my car, and failed it. They informed me that the radius arm bushing needed to be replaced. (Don't ask me what it is, I think it has something to do with the axle though.) They also told me not to drive it anymore, especially not fast or far. Well I did anyway. I had places to go, people to see. They, too, are kind people - didn't charge me, and gave me advice on where to fix it and how much it would cost. A few hundred dollars. I had spent that much before, but I didn't want to again. I freaked out. Started thinking about my options.

That's when I heard about Cash for Clunkers from my good friend Bryce. A new government program that allows you to turn in your PoS and get $4,500 off a new car. This was the deal for me. My car fit all the qualifications: low gas mileage(13-15 mpg), old ('94), registered and insured for the past year (although it didn't matter that I couldn't get it re-registered). I researched the program, calling around to different dealerships to get more information. My dad knows a guy, Ross, at the Ken Garff dealership down town. We worked up a deal with him, and before I knew it I was test driving a brand new Nissan Versa. I was getting pretty excited about this. A new car!! But as I thought through it more and more, I realized that I couldn't handle a new car payment each month, especially as a new college student. That bright light of hope I had of a new car dimmed quickly as I looked for places to get my car fixed.

I started calling around for the best deals on getting a new radius arm bushing. I found that Big O' Tires and Clayton Snow's American Car Center could do it the cheapest. I took my car in for them to look at it and get a better estimate. Big O' said about $190, whereas Clayton said $125, so I took it to Mr. Snow. But before, when I had been at Just, they told me my front tire had a puncture and would need to be changed. So while I was in Big O' I asked about a new tire. They were actually able to get me a used on for $26.71. It was the only one they had that would fit my car and would be that cheap, so I jumped all over it (figuratively). Directly after that I went to get the rest of car fixed, well a piece of it. Clayton was pretty confident that he could fix it for a good price, however he did warn me that with a problem like mine another part on the axle could've been wearing and might need to be replaced as well. Sure enough it did. Couldn't tell you what the piece was, but it's something that was supposed to be round and was now oval, not good. So after replacing both those parts, it came to $215.60. That was just about all the money I had at the time, but luckily I have a wonderful father who loves to help me out, and covered this one for me.

Now it had been awhile since my last oil change and I get a free one every now and then at Midas with the two-year maintenance plan my car has. So I took it for the change, and asked for a inspection since my car had been fixed. Much to my surprise, they told me my brake hoses were cracked and that I'd fail the safety inspection if I didn't fix them, and it'd cost me over $200. (What did Big O' fix just last year? I better not need new brake equipment.) This was pretty freakin' frustrating! I called my dad, mostly to get a credit card number to pay for it, cause I didn't have enough on my card at the time, but he told me I was being taking advantage of and to take it back to Just for the inspection. So I got the free oil change, but the emissions cost $25.50. Thanks for charging me for the part I didn't fail. Good to know success in life will cost ya.

And back I went to Just Inspection and Emissions. They remembered me from when I was in a week or two before. They didn't want to charge me for the whole inspection again since they had just looked at it and knew I got the problem fixed. They couldn't find any paper work from the last time I was in (because they didn't give my any), so they searched my car for it and found the receipt from Midas. Then they started questioning me why I went there, as if I had been unloyal to them. Freak, I needed an oil change; give me a break. I assured them that Midas had been unfair and that's why I came back. They passed me and gave me new registration, for a total of $79.50 I don't think I paid for the inspection or emissions but that was quite a lot for renewal. However, I trust these guys. As for Midas, why did I need new brake hoses there, but I didn't at Just? I think one of those companies was taking advantage of a stupid little blonde girl. See if I go there for anything but the free oil change ever again.

After all of that I have a car that gets me to where I'm going, for which, I am grateful. I just hope it keeps getting me there, for at least a couple more years. And now my car is mostly fixed. I still don't have air conditioning, one of doors is falling apart, there are holes in the fabric of my ceiling, and the 'check engine' light just came on...better get that looked at.

My Second Home

*A tradition had been started many years before I was even born. This tradition became apart of my life, made me who I am. But it didn't start out as such a big deal. It began with my parents wanting a simple family vacation (my mom had wanted to go somewhere like San Diego, for the beach.). After doing some research they decided on Bear Lake, "one of the largest natural lakes in the Western United States".That sold it for my parents, and we have gone to Bear Lake every year since.

I have been to Bear Lake every summer of my life. I look forward to it, expect it. One year there was talk of not going, and that just about killed me. Luckily, we went. One of my first memories of being there was my older sister telling me about the bear lake monster. Of course the monster is just a folktale, but as a young child you believe everything you hear. My sister pulled out an old newspaper article that told about the Bear Lake monster; it even had a picture of it. I couldn't believe my eyes. At first I hadn't believed her, but once she showed me the picture it was as real as Santa Clause. I knew the Bear Lake Monster was real and it terrified me. That year I hardly swam in the lake at all. I was convinced that I went too far out it was going to eat me. So I stayed in the most shallow water and played on the beach almost the whole time. It wasn't until the next year that I found there was no monster in the lake, it was all made up.I then cleverly told the story to my younger siblings who were now afraid to go swimming in the lake. The pattern would go on for the rest of the siblings.

As I mentioned before, this was a tradition. Well, after many years of doing the this I noticed a pattern of our little trip. We began by loading into the van, and with 16 of us that's no easy chore. Of course, we took two vehicles, but with all the luggage it's still a squeeze. We stay at Bear Lake for about a week, and with all those people we couldn't very well eat out all the time. So about half way there we stopped at a local grocery store in Logan, to get our weeks worth of nutrients: cookies, chips, burritos, hot dogs, etc... Then, with all that crammed on top of all the people and luggage we headed onward towards our destination.

Driving into the mountains is one of my favorite parts of the drive; it meant we were getting close. It’s a beautiful drive as well: green hills with lots of trees and flowers. But the best part is reaching the top of the mountain; just over the horizon, seeing that first line of blue. Bear Lake has the bluest water I've ever seen. Some call it the "Caribbean of the Rockies" because of the turquoise tint of the water. From that point it was only about ten minutes until we arrived at the O.R.E. resort, one of the nicest in Garden City. This resort had its guests living well with nice grassy lawns, barbecue grills, playground, mini golf course, convenience store, and private pool. We had stayed at these condos ever since I could remember. My siblings and I always referred to them as “the brown condos” since all you can see are dozens of identical brown buildings when you first pull into the resort. Even though they are all exactly alike, I could still tell 'my condo' apart from the others. It was about ten over from the left and had a crooked tree in front of it.

Now it was time to unload all the groceries, luggage, and children. With all the helping hands it only took a few trips to get everything up and into the condo. After putting everything in their proper places-throwing the luggage on the floor-we changed into our swimming suits and headed for the beach. This was one of the nicest beaches in Bear Lake, and it was reserved for O.R.E. residents only. The beach had the best sand in the world (perfect for making sand castles and burying little siblings) but as many people know, the water is freezing! We always go in August so the lake has had all summer to warm up, yet it stills takes at least 10 minutes before we can completely submerge under the water.

Even though this resort is incredible, that isn't why we came. We came for the Lake. We'd spend as much time as possible in the water. At least every year my dad would take all the kids would were adventurous enough to swim out to the buoy. There are a line of red and white buoys 100 yards from the shore, marking the no-wake zone for boats and jet skis. The first few years I wouldn't dare go out there. The first time I tried I got terrified and turned around before the water was even passed my shoulders. But I remember the first time I actually did make it all the way. What an accomplishment. It wasn't easy to do; the current and wind are pushing you back in, water is splashing in your face, and the sun is beating down on you. I felt like Gertrude Ederle, the first woman to cross the English Channel. Of course her feat was quite larger than mine, but nevertheless mine was a feat.

Another tradition we have is renting a boat and riding to the other side of the lake. We call it our laguna. Its a place where no one else goes; where we can't see anyone for miles. We 'park' the boat and jump into the water. If you are unwilling to jump, my dad will push you. I suggest just jumping. There's no beach, just a deep drop off from the side of the mountain. The bottom of the lake can't be seen there. Who know whats swimming beneath you, maybe the Bear Lake monster.

The wonderful tradition of going every year continued on, but it changed a little. My parents, who grew to love it so much up there, bought two condos in Harbor Village, just a few miles up the road from the O.R.E. resort, and it had the most beautiful view of the lake and the city. We could now go up to Bear Lake any time of the year we wanted to. So we did. Any weekend the family could get off we packed up all our things and stayed a few days in our condos. This was like a dream come true. With all that time spent up there Garden City became very familiar to me.

Garden City is a little town on the south side of Bear Lake. When I say little town I mean it. The population is approximately 357 people and the city sits on about 4 1/2 square miles. Most of the shops are personally owned by the residents and run all year round. It is famous for the festival Raspberry Days and the Raspberry Shakes, which my family get every year. Pure vanilla ice cream and raspberries swirled into a smooth cup of heaven. There were numerous shops that sold these and I took it upon myself to try them from each place. I came to find it didn't really matter where I got them, they were delicious anywhere.

My father would take all the kids on a drive around the lake, across the Utah-Idaho border and around the 50 mile perimeter. This really gave me a feel for the lake and all its surroundings. I learned that the south side of the lake has much better beaches than the north. My parents picked right from the beginning. But it was wonderful to see all that the lake had to offer. It was continuously beautiful all the way around, the water as blue as ever. On one of those drives we took a road off of the main one and went back into the mountains. We found something we had never known about, what we came to call "the secret valley." Hardly any homes were back there. It had wide open spaces with rolling green hills and little dirt road that took deeper and deeper into the mountain. We all planned that we would one day build a house there and have a our own little secret get away.

Garden City and Bear Lake became more than just a vacation spot. It became my second home. Going there every year became something I look forward to and long for. It is a dream of mine to have my own home in Garden City and become part of the 357. Bear Lake has become apart of me forever, and who knows, maybe one day I'll buy a little cabin right on the beach.

*This was a paper I wrote for my English class. It is 99% true. I dressed it up a little bit to make it a more interesting paper.

Real Salt Lake

This past weekend I went to a Real Soccer game. I got invited last minute by my friend Andrew. We also went with his friends Missy and Daniel. I didn't know much about soccer. I didn't know it was split into two 45 minute parts and they keep the clock running constantly, and I didn't know many of the rules. Luckily Andrew explained most of this to me and I have since gained respect for the game.

We had pretty decent seats, row 20, considering we got the tickets for free. This was the sold out game of the season; although, it was kids night. Apparently all kids got in for free or cheap or something. Seriously, tons of kids everywhere. There was a little girl's soccer team sitting in front of me the whole time. And of course their fanatic soccer coach with them, who still wishes he was in the game. The girls were either chanting Real or singing Hannah Montana songs. It got old quick, but I tried to pay attention to the game. It was actually quite interesting.

We played the Kansas Wizards. (their small section of fans sure did have some spirit. They must've brought a smoke machine, I thought they were on fire until the smoke kept going the whole second half and no seemed to care.) We lost 2 - 0, but made a valiant effort. We almost made three goals, but unfortunately they like kicking it at the posts instead of the goal. No, I'm sure the Wizards were just great competitors. It was a very interesting game to watch. It is amazing to me how fast they can run, and I loved seeing the ball fly across the field. Its quite a long distance. And they can kick and hit it with incredible accuracy. Aren't athletes amazing. I have a new deep respect for soccer.